Sunday, November 17, 2013

they just don't get it

We have had an influx of relatives coming our way of late. When we travel we are not the type to stay
with people for all sorts of reasons. We would rather have our space and give other people their space.
Seems as though not everyone is like us. I've had to limit people staying with us to a week and no more. As I've said many times before we're not any easy couple to be around at times and the last thing I need is to feel uncomfortable in my own home.

It's always interesting when explaining this to relatives but I've become pretty good at it now. I'm less interested in the worry associated with offending people and more interested in maintaining a functioning husband and our cosy private space which is our home.

Even those that know my husband well and his condition find it hard to understand the full impact of living with PTSD. In so many ways I understand why this is the case. Unless you have been directly impacted by something why would you understand?

Today while chatting with my husband we may have said 'they just don't get it' on more than one occasion when referring to our visitors. We are learning to set our boundaries and try and encourage others to understand why we need to do this. Sometimes it works but sometimes 'they just don't get it'!

Do you find you need to set boundaries when people want to come and stay with you?

Thursday, November 7, 2013

doing nothing

We've been on holidays. We were so looking forward to this holiday as it has been another year that has exhausted us and left us looking at a future we are not yet comfortable with. We knew we needed to warm up and spend time doing lots of nothing much at all. Being on the go doesn't work for us.

We flew off out of rainy cold Hobart and headed for the tropical heat of Thailand. This is a place I have been visiting for the past 24 years (I couldn't believe it when I first added the years up). I first went there as an exchange student when I left school. I can speak some of the language, love the people, the place, the culture and the food.

Travelling away from home can certainly throw up a few challenge let alone travelling with a PTSD suffer. Airports are never good and this trip was no exception. Oh boy!

Anyhow once we got to our destination we were able to slowly unwind and relax as best as we could.

We find the Thai people very gentle and polite and that works well for us. Nothing is a problem and they will do their very best to ensure you have a lovely time.

Doing lots of nothing can take a bit of work at first. Avoiding the temptation to fill the day with activities soon wore off. My brain had a chance to declutter, I had time to sleep in the sun, swim at sunrise, sip cocktails at sunset, forget the grocery shopping list and spend happy times with my husband.

Now that I'm home I am resisting the urge to make lists, get busy, talk with people and basically let the world in again. I wonder how long it will last?

Do you look forward to a break each year? Do you find it hard to unwind?

Swimming in this water with the fish scooting past was just wonderful...